“The Conners” Cancels Whoopi Goldberg’s Guest Spot: “She’ll Drive Down Ratings”

ABC’s super-woke sitcom-turned-social justice warrior showcase, “The Conners,” announced a special guest appearance this season by none other than Whoopi Goldberg.

Then the letters and emails started.

It seems that nobody, not even the uber-wokers who watch that garbage, wants anything to do with Whoopi after her latest stunt.

According to our source at the network, the episode has been officially canceled and the cast will have to reshoot without Whoopi’s character.

“We were gonna re-cast the rolls with Alyssa Milano,” said director Joe Barron, “but she was otherwise occupied with an Elon Musk lawsuit.”

What does that mean for Whoopi? It means she won’t get the $3 million payout for appearing in 4 minutes of poorly-written dramacom, and she won’t get the points she needs to qualify for a floor seat at the Oscars this year.

“It’s a little bit unfair,” said Goldberg’s spokesman, Skip Tetheludah, “considering we weren’t informed of the rule change until after midnight last Tuesday. Under these circumstances, Ms. Goldberg should be able to re-qualify by picking up a spot on Grey’s Anatomy.”

Of course she wants to just bypass the rules and do what’s best for Whoopi Goldberg, patriots, because she’s Whoopi Goldberg.

For what it’s worth, Whoopi was also canceled from Star Trek. God Bless America.

Related Posts

If you can remember HER you must be considered old. She is 65 years old and still beautiful

Jamie Lee Curtis, now 65, is a celebrated actress whose career spans decades, from her breakout in Halloween to her Oscar-winning role in Everything Everywhere All at…

The Enduring Legacy of Storage Wars

ever-evolving landscape of reality television, few shows have managed to blend competition, curiosity, and human connection quite like Storage Wars. What began as a simple concept—people bidding…

M*A*S*H legend has died aged 82

Actor Patrick Adiarte, who had a recurring role on season one of the beloved sitcom M*A*S*H, died this Tuesday at the age of 82. Adiarte enjoyed a…

Female Interviewer Recounts Time She Was Booted Off Trump’s Plane

Long before Donald Trump was elected president, a British interviewer related an incident that she now finds amusing. Ruby Wax is a 70-year-old comedian who has been…

ABC Anchor Admits Truth As Trump’s DC Crackdown Yields Big Results

Washington didn’t see this coming. One presidential order, and the streets filled with federal agents, National Guard troops, and fear. Crime numbers dipped. Immigration arrests exploded. A…

Most people get this wrong and toss out the can. The right way to read ‘Best By’ or ‘Best Before’ dates

“Best by” labels on canned products, like corn, green beans, and tuna, indicate when the food is at its peak quality, not an expiration date. These foods…

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *